Be Beyond Measure

How to Rebuild Yourself After a Bad Breakup




“It took a while for her to figure out she could run but when she did she was long gone, Long gone..”
― Keith Urban

Going through a bad breakup or divorce can be tough on anyone. It's like a death of a relationship because the bond you once shared with someone is now broken. So where do you go from here? How can you be beyond this experience and find your true authentic self? Although the relationship is gone it doesn't mean that your happiness is over, it's just subsided for awhile. In these hard times, it's good to remember the good times and forgive the bad ones. People grow apart and sometimes the whole dynamic of the relationship changes.

So now that you have grown out of this phase with this person, it's time for you to find out who your are. Sometimes those love bonds can be so strong that you feel you like you can't go on without this person, but you can. Love can be blind and sometimes the people we feel are good for us turn out to be the ones that hurt us the most. I was in a marriage for 8 years and it was one of the biggest challenges of my life. I wanted it to work it out but I soon realized that it just wasn't for me and sometimes you just have to get to that point in your life.

 So after the storm how can you rebuild? Rebuilding and finding yourself is so important to your healing process so you can move on. I believe that relationships rather good or bad help us to be the greatest versions of ourselves. Although this is hard to see while going through the pain, the other side of this is much brighter. The harder you fall the stronger you are when you get up. Someone once told me "You are stronger than you think you are" and at the time I didn't believe it. But this statement is true. You are beyond what you ever think you will be. You just have to get out of your own way and you can do this by changing your thought process. So here are a few tips to help you start the process of rebuilding yourself.

• Learn to really love yourself and know that you are worthy of love. Dedicate a love song to yourself and really mean it. Just imagine if you really loved yourself the way you wanted someone else to love you. This is a really powerful thing to do because you are changing the way you look at love and therefore you will attract that kind of love you desire into your life. It's definitely worked for me.

• Write positive notes about yourself and stick them somewhere where you can see them everyday. Now it's time to retrain your mind into some positive thinking.

• Get a progress journal and write in it everyday

• Have a great support system. Talk to people that know and love you the most.

• Get out of the house and try something new. There's nothing like starting over and doing new things. It helps to put a different perspective on things and also helps to forget/forgive the past life.

I know that this may be a very hard time in your life but you must believe that you can rise above it rule your world. Remember that this is only a tests and that this will make you greater than you ever imagined. If you need to grieve then grieve. Give yourself a little time out of each day to think about it and move on. Stay busy with something that you like to do and get plenty of rest. This is only a phase in your life and "This to shall pass." Try your best to stay positive and remember that you are beyond what you think you are.